Howling Clementine

don't even try to hide your misandry any more, do you?

Wed, 08 May 2013 20:53:29 +1000

Nah.

synecdoche: themorallycorruptfayeresnick: people are...

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 13:15:50 +1000

themorallycorruptfayeresnick:

people are garbage

yesterday i asked my mother to transfer $5 into my bank account so i could afford to pick up the medicine that keeps me alive anyway congrats zach braff!

God. I can’t believe that after giving Zach Braff ticket money to see that piece of junk Garbage State, people are willing to give him more to make another one. Ugh.

Clam Bistro: some thoughts on amanda bynes, grimes, and being seen

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 13:02:34 +1000

Clam Bistro: some thoughts on amanda bynes, grimes, and being seen:

myloveinthug:

to be human is to want to be truly seen by others, and to tell your own story. to be famous is to have that image and that story hijacked by others. why should it be astonishing that celebrities freak out sometimes? that they act out to try to wrest back control?

the…

Some pretty spot on observations about the exploitation of Amanda Bynes here.

Entitled: If media covered America the way we cover foreign cultures

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 12:55:04 +1000

Entitled: If media covered America the way we cover foreign cultures:

jahanzebjz:

Yet another massacre has occurred in the historically war-torn region of the Southern United States – and so soon after the religious festival of Easter.

Brian McConkey, 27, a Christian fundamentalist militiaman living in the formerly occupied territory of Alabama, gunned down three men from an opposing tribe in the village square near Mobile, the capitol, over a discussion that may have involved the rituals of the local football cult. In this region full of heavily-armed local warlords and radical Christian clerics, gun violence is part of the life of many.

Many of the militiamen here are ethnic Scots-Irish tribesmen, a famously indomitable mountain people who have killed civilized men – and each other – for centuries. It appears that the wars that started on the fields of Bannockburn and Sterling have come to America.

As the sun sets over the former Confederate States of America, one wonders – can peace ever come to this land?

This is pretty goddamn brilliant.

mischasbrainfarts: callingoutbigotry: pipud: ut4ps: Race...

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 12:53:00 +1000

mischasbrainfarts:

callingoutbigotry:

pipud:

ut4ps:

Race matters.

Must reblog.

For the people asking “but why do you have to bring race into it?”

I recommend The New Jim Crow. A very eye opening read.

This is Rachel Wiley performing her poem, 10 Honest Thoughts On...

Sun, 14 Apr 2013 19:57:40 +1000

This is Rachel Wiley performing her poem, 10 Honest Thoughts On Being Loved By A Skinny Boy.

"1. I say, ‘I am fat.’ He says ‘No, you are beautiful.’ I wonder why I cannot be both. He kisses me..."

Sun, 14 Apr 2013 19:49:30 +1000

“

1.
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says ‘No, you are beautiful.’
I wonder why I cannot be both.
He kisses me
hard.

2.
My college theater professor once told me
that despite my talent,
I would never be cast as a romantic lead.
We do plays that involve singing animals
and children with the ability to fly,
but apparently no one
has enough willing suspension of disbelief
to go with anyone loving a fat girl.
I daydream regularly
about fucking my boyfriend vigorously on his front lawn.

3.
On the mornings I do not feel pretty,
while he is still asleep,
I sit on the floor and check the pockets of his skinny jeans for motive,
for a punchline,
for other girls’ phone numbers.

4.
When we hold hands in public,
I wonder if he notices the looks —
like he is handling a parade balloon on a crowded sidewalk;
if he notices that my hands are now made of rope.

5.
Dear Cosmo: Fuck you.
I will not take sex tips from you
on how to please a man you think I do not deserve.

6.
He tells me he loves me with the lights on.

7.
I can cup his hip bone in my hand,
feel his ribs without pressing very hard at all.
He does not believe me when I tell him he is beautiful.
Sometimes I fear the day he does will be the day he leaves.

8.
The cute hipster girl at the coffee shop
assumes we are just friends
and flirts over the counter.
I spend the next two weeks
mentally replacing myself with her
in all of our photographs.
When I admit this to him
we spend the evening taking new photos together.
He will not let me delete a single one of them.

9.
The phrase “Big girls need love too” can die in a fire.
Fucking me does not require an asterisk.
Loving me is not a fetish.
Finding me beautiful is not a novelty.
I am not a fucking novelty.

10.
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says, ‘No. You are so much more’,
and kisses me
hard.

”

- Rachel Wiley (via acynicalcunt)

foreverrrr reblog

(via shewhorollswithrolls)

ouch right in the feels

(via darlingcunt)

wonderful and powerful

(via zezili)

Always reblog.

(via lifeonthisside)

Audio

Thu, 21 Mar 2013 17:45:32 +1100

How to handle a patronising dipshit: A guide

Sat, 09 Mar 2013 14:45:00 +1100

I received this email this morning in response to my Daily Life piece yesterday on the absence of women’s voices in media.

“Hi Clementine,

Obviously you have not listened to Lindy Burns on ABC 774 Monday to Friday from 7.00 to 10.00 PM. Prior to this gig she hosted the Drive show for several years.

Before Lindy did Drive we had Virginia Trioli hosting Drive for years and she was brilliant. It’s a pity she went to Sydney , where she did not do as well.

Perhaps a bit more research would make your story a bit more believable.”

And here is where I deliver what I believe is known as a ‘SICK BURN’ to the fellow who took precious time out of his day to prove something I omitted in the written submission of the piece - that people often point to Lindy Burns as proof that gender disparity is a lie.

“Hi G_______,

Interestingly, when I delivered the speech I mentioned people who think the name ‘Lindy Burns’ is somehow proof that women don’t experience sexism in radio. I’m thrilled to have someone prove my point. So thank you for that. You’ve no idea how satisfying it is to have what you predict will happen come true.

As to Virginia Trioli and Lindy Burns being proof that women somehow experience equality in radio just because two of them have worked at the ABC, I’ll add some more to your list.

Kelly Higgins-Devine, Eleanor Hall, Rebecca Levingston, Linda Mottram, Sonya Feldhoff, Gillian O’Shaughnessey, Julia Christensen, Kate O’Toole, Vicki Kerrigan, Nadine Moroney, Sarah Gillman, Penny Terry, Helen Shield, Geneveive Jacobs, Alex Sloan.

16 women across all the major capital cities in local ABC studios in Australia (we must absent Trioli because she no longer works in local radio). Let’s look at the blokes, shall we?

Jon Faine, Richard Fidler, Matt Abraham, David Bevan, Peter Goers, Raphael Epstein, Red Symons, Tony Eastley, Richard Stubbs, Tim Palmer, Tony Delroy, Ian Henschke, Michael Smyth, Adam Spencer, James Valentine, Richard Glover, Dominic Knight, Spencer Howson, Steve Austin, Tim Cox, Jonathan Morrell, Eoin Cameron, Geoff Hutchison, Russell Woolf, Trevor Chappell, Matt Brann, Richard Margetson, Ivor Cole, Stewart Brash, Rohan Barwick, Ryk Goddard, Tony Briscoe, Damien Brown, Ross Solly, Adam Shirley.

35 men. So of 51 people working in ABC local radio across Australia (I looked at Adelaide, Melbourne, Sydney, Brisbane, Hobart, Perth, Canberra, Darwin and Alice Springs), only 31.3% of positions are held by women. This is just shy of supporting my statement that women fill 20 - 30% of the public space.

But when you further consider that, of those 35 men, four of them have shows simulcast around the country (Trevor Chappell, Tony Eastley, Tony Delroy, Tim Palmer are simulcast across 9 stations) and two of them simulcast around parts of the country (Richard Fidler with 7 simulcasts and Dominic Knight with 2) - and only 1 woman can boast similar (Eleanor Hall with The World Today) - then the numbers become a little different.

What we’re then saying is that out of 99 weekday timeslots across 9 different stations, 75 of those have male hosts and only 24 have women. That means only around 24.24% of voices heard around the country on local ABC stations across the board belong to women. Or, to give you a different perspective, 75.76% of those 99 shows belong to men.

So the next time you feel like writing to a woman pointing out inequality to tell her to do your research better, perhaps you should actually do some of your own. Lindy Burns may host the Evenings show on ABC 774, but the state of womanhood isn’t a characteristic whose presence in and of itself signifies thoughtful diversity.

Regards,

Clementine Ford”

An open letter to Fairfax Digital

Mon, 04 Mar 2013 12:59:00 +1100

Dear Men,

I’m writing to you to express my astonishment at Fairfax’s decision to re-label Daily Life as the ‘Women’s Perspective’ in the redesigns of both The Age and the SMH websites.

I imagine Dominic Knight, Christopher Scanlon and Andrew P Street (among others) will be surprised to realise that all this time they’ve been offering insight into the female condition. The rules of pangender representation DO dictate that men must have a greater than 50% level of input in order to preserve the universal perspective that the existence of a penis ensures. And vaginas have an unfortunately marginalising effect on dialogue, which is how we know to dismiss anything their owners talk about when too many of them are present in any one conversation. But I thought Fairfax prided itself on rejecting tired old stereotypes like that?

Frankly, I expected better from Fairfax when it came to respecting its female writers and readers. As far as I can tell, you and your colleagues have not only completely disregarded the popularity of Daily Life but you’ve demonstrated a woeful lack of respect for your audience - both female AND male. I feel embarrassed that I even have to revisit lessons from Feminism 101 with you, but women’s opinions are neither niche, nor do they need to be packaged as some kind of alternative and/or irrelevant perspective from the norm (that being the default male position, where the real news and change-making occurs). “Women’s Perspective”? For goodness sake, just because Fairfax’s mastheads have gone tabloid physically doesn’t mean they need to follow suit editorially. Could you have chosen a more disparaging way to demonstrate your complete disregard for the contributions Daily Life makes to Fairfax’s digital presence? Do you think it could have even been possible for you to decide on a more patronising tactic to show exactly which sections of the newspaper you think matter and which don’t?

This isn’t just about the woeful label you’ve assigned. To be fair, Daily Life is a proudly female biased website and has never made a secret of that. But the deliberate choice to identify it solely as the ‘women’s perspective’ implies to your readers not just that the views found therein will be either manifestly irrelevant to their lives and can therefore choose to skip them altogether, but also that this perspective (which apparently all women share) is somehow different from what one might find in the rest of the newspaper. You know, the ‘important’ parts. Additionally, to isolate this ‘perspective’ and then bury it beneath sections like Life&Style and Entertainment (sections also dismissed as ‘fluffy women’s stuff’) belies your withering disdain for a website that may have nothing of interest in it FOR YOU, but whose preoccupations and focus are of importance to a great number of women and men.

These are clearly deliberate decisions you’ve made, and I’m appalled by the aggressively sexist way in which you’ve chosen to show just how little you think of the dedicated women and men behind Daily Life. Granted, we may not be providing Australians with hard-hitting stories like Executive Style’s (now featuring prominently in the ‘Business’ section) “Best Watches Under $1000” or how great dress shoes can anchor a man’s wardrobe, but surely articles exploring victim-blaming, the racist whitewashing of ‘universal stories’ and the devastating effect adolescent bullying can have run a close second?

Given the imminent launching of the Guardian Australia - a newspaper which has consistently demonstrated a respect for women’s voices, views and issues - I’m perplexed as to why Fairfax Digital would present itself as the kind of news outlet in which these things are considered ‘other’ and irrelevant. When you consider especially the fact that women make up the largest numbers of information consumers on the internet and are growing increasingly tired of being condescended to by old media and its desperate struggle to become new, the decision seems less perplexing and more outright stupid.

But I guess that’s just my ‘women’s perspective’ talking, and as I learned this morning nobody cares about that.

Kind regards,

Clementine Ford

Callout for women working in the media to provide feedback on sexism

Thu, 28 Feb 2013 17:34:00 +1100

Are you a woman working in the media, either behind the scenes or as a presenter? I’m delivering the Pamela Denoon Lecture next week in Canberra on the topic of Misogyny, Power and the Media. I’m looking for some anecdotal (and anonymous) feedback from women working in the media industry on possible incidents of sexism they may have experienced. If you’re interested in contributing (or just getting some long held grievances off your chest!) then you can email me on clementine.ford@gmail.com.

I’ve attached some questions below as a general rough guide to what I’m looking for. Because it’s a speech, these will all be anecdotal retellings and so you don’t have to worry about confidentiality at all. Totally anonymous.

1. How long have you worked in the media, and which area of the industry do you work in? (radio/tv/print, politics/lifestyle/sport etc)

2. Have you experienced sexism in the workplace? 3. If yes, how has it impacted on your ability to do your job?

4. Is there a noticeable difference in the way men and women are treated in your industry area?

5. Do you think women struggle with a paygap in the media?

6. What are the challenges facing women in the media today?

7. Can you name one incident that stands out in your mind as a time you experienced clear sexism in the workplace?

8. What would you say to people who suggested sexism - particularly in the media - was a myth, and that the workplace is a meritocracy?

9. How does age play a part in the way women are treated in the media industry?

Feel free to pass along to anyone you think might be interested. And don’t worry about flooding me with information - even though I won’t be able to use all of it, I’ve no doubt at all it will come in handy down the track.

PS If you’re a man and desperate to add your voice (oh, the irony!) please feel free to do so.

8===D

Mon, 18 Feb 2013 22:41:44 +1100

Felinel Richie.

Sat, 02 Feb 2013 02:21:52 +1100

Felinel Richie.

thefrogman: [video] Oh, bless his little scared hairy face.

Wed, 30 Jan 2013 17:12:12 +1100

thefrogman:

[video]

Oh, bless his little scared hairy face.

Photo

Sat, 26 Jan 2013 15:12:26 +1100

A mish mash of thoughts about Australia Day, culture and history

Sat, 26 Jan 2013 14:50:21 +1100

i started writing the following as an update on Facebook. Then it turned into a mini essay, and here I am. It is less a structured piece and more a series of thoughts with no beginning, middle or end.

***

I once heard Julian Burnside give the opening address of an art exhibition in Adelaide. Like the officials who spoke before him, he acknowledged the Kaurna people. But he also made a point of saying that, apart from regularly acknowledging the land of the traditional owners, we were doing pretty much nothing to give it back or respect their custodianship. Paying lip service to the rights of Indigenous people doesn’t mean much if that’s all it is.

I was born in Queensland. My recent trips there have demonstrated to me that, despite my best efforts to deny it, some part of that land flows in my spirit. I am moved by its colours, its smells and the gentle hum of the ground beneath my feet. I have stood in rainforests with trees as old as time itself and felt a quiet reverence and humility at my own insignificance. I’ve swum in creeks and listened to the whispers in the wind, and I’ve felt at peace. The mythology of the land that I feel must surely be compounded for a people whose cultural identity moves so fluidly within it. That they are routinely marginalised, brutalised and denied the respect of custodianship is an abominable reflection on this nation we are all supposed to be so proud of.

The idea of Aboriginal connection to land and country is treated scornfully by some, as if it’s all part of a nefarious plan to take even more than we’ve apparently already given them. In the same breath, such revisionists will declare their own pride in being Australian, this apparently mystical state of being that comes from being born under the Southern Cross. These same Proud Australians will accuse asylum seekers of being greedy and lazy fraudsters, as if their aspirational desire to live in a country free from war or oppression is somehow more calculated than our aspirational desires to prosper in a country we were lucky enough to be born in. Australians on welfare are demonised as being bludgers and wastrels, as if the only thing separating them from the kind of privilege that comes from private schooling, connections or even just a solid middle class upbringing is determination and willpower. I look around and see safe, comfortable Australians with more than enough feverishly hoarding their rights and privileges as if extending them to others means less for them. Is that the Australia we want to be proud of? Is that the Australia we come together to celebrate?

The whole Australia Day/Invasion Day thing is fraught and tricky. We are blessed to live in this country and enjoy all the benefits of democracy, subsidised health care and economic prosperity - but the cultural dialogue conveniently ignores the fact we’ve done nothing to earn or deserve it. I’m not suggesting we have to wear a black armband on January 26th and burn a flag in the backyard - but I do think it’s essential that any Australia Day celebrations acknowledge where we’ve come from, how we got here and who we continue to step on to build this nation.

We are blessed. But it is privilege, not entitlement, that allows us to mark this day not with a sense of loss but a slab of beer and a sausage sizzle.

Competition for young female writers

Thu, 24 Jan 2013 13:43:19 +1100

Young Vagabond is a magazine for teenage girls soon to be launched in Australia. From their website:

YOUNG VAGABOND PLEDGES TO…

+ Encourage our readers to think critically about everything presented to them by the media, including the content of Young Vagabond.+ Accurately represent real women and girls, to champion their achievements in all the ways we know how, and to encourage our readers to do the same.+ Create an ethos of awareness, discovery and acceptance of the world and of the self.+ Encourage our readers to have adventures, to embrace their freedom, to live passionately and to appreciate their capabilities.+ Only ever publish content and advertising that fits with the Young Vagabond ethos.

As a part of my pledge to their Pozible campaign (which has now closed, with the editors breaking their target - huzzah!), I received a reward. The editors have kindly allowed me to pass it on to another young female writer just starting out and looking for some mentorship and experience.

When I first started writing professionally, I had some wonderful people who passed on opportunities like the above to me. I found it immensely helpful not just in my own professional development, but in helping me to establish an ethos around support and mentorship rather than competition. I would like to do the same for another young writer. So, if you win:

In addition to receiving 2 print copies of issue one of YV magazine, you will have the opportunity to work closely with the editors to write a feature article that will be published in both the online and print versions of the magazine. You will also receive a single pass to their 2013 launch party, to be held in Melbourne.

I can only choose one person. To enter to win this amazing prize, email me a pitch for a story along with a short description of yourself, your professional experience (it’s okay if you have none!) and your writing goals.

Things to remember about the pitch:

* Make it short and snappy. I like to write a snappy one line summary, with a longer paragraph underneath to flesh out the idea, the aims and the shape of the story. Your pitch should not be the length of a small novelette. An interested editor will ask further questions based on an interesting pitch, but they won’t appreciate emails that take half an hour to read.

* Bear in mind this is a magazine targeting teenage girls - like with any pitch, don’t forget to familiarise yourself with the magazine’s ethos first so you can tailor your content to suit them.

* Be professional. Don’t write in text speak or sarcastically. Be succinct and clear - there will be time for sarcasm and jokes when you’ve already established a relationship with your editor.

* Write about something YOU’RE passionate about, not what you think will suit the audience. The time for selling your soul will come later, when you can do it for $1 a word.

Email entries to me on clementine DOT ford AT gmail DOT com. Entries close Friday 1st February (that’s next week).

Good luck!

penis BAD. vagina GOOD. male voice BAD BAD BAD EXTERMINATE. female voice HOORAY STUFF MEN WOMEN ARE BETTER

Wed, 23 Jan 2013 18:21:47 +1100

These are the kind of articulate, thoughtful emails I receive from the brainiacs who disagree with me. Yeah, it’s pretty hard to keep going when faced with the weight of such a powerful intellect.

This iPhone 5 demo message has annoyed me since I first saw it....

Thu, 10 Jan 2013 16:01:36 +1100

This iPhone 5 demo message has annoyed me since I first saw it. So I made some changes to it. I don’t know who this ‘Dave Becker’ thinks he is, but Vivian is tired of this shit.

badassladyknight: plotdesigner: avelera: dimbosama: avelera: ...

Wed, 09 Jan 2013 14:48:22 +1100

badassladyknight:

plotdesigner:

avelera:

dimbosama:

avelera:

hoflords:

nerdyfacts:

(Source.)

We have to understand that no matter what we do with our lives we will never be as awesome as Christopher Lee is.

I will never get over how he corrected Peter Jackson on the proper sound a man makes when he’s been stabbed in the back because he actually worked in the British clandestine services.

Or how he volunteered to fight in one of the most brutal fronts of WWII (the Finnish-Russian Winter War).

Or how he was fucking NAZI HUNTER.

Basically, Christopher Lee is the real Most Interesting Man in the world and I honestly don’t know why we tell Chuck Norris jokes when this badass is walking around.

And then I see him rambling on about how Saruman and Gandalf are actually Istari, which are one of the Maia in the LotR commentaries and I realize he literally cannot become more awesome.

Oh can’t he?

#Christopher Lee wrote a Metal Opera about Charlemagne #all opinions are irrelevant

I just read up on that and now I regret I didn’t include it! The man is 90 years old and he’s releasing a metal album next year. ACTUAL MOST INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD CHRISTOPHER LEE.

[swoons]

Christopher Lee: Better than you since 1922.